It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
