i jhust puked up my retainher.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
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