Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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