I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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