this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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