he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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