I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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