well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize