Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
