and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
