I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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