so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
FUCK WHALES
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
