hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
