She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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