and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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