It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
