I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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