so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
