There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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