oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
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