Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
tell me about the fingering
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