Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Hippo gnu deer
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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