honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
