Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize