Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Randomize