girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize