fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
