Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
He passed out mid-signature
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
