I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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