The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
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