Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
