Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
