He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Randomize