I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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