I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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