Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
