i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
