Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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