the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Drunk is a universal language darling
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
