were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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