I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
