am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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