did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
