the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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