I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
