My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize