i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
