would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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