Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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