she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
