She is in my trunk
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
